Inspirational Thoughts

Sunday, March 15, 2009

Thank Heavens for P

oop. What a month this has been!!!!! Between the girls both getting sick, and me having this "fun" experience recently, I'll be glad for March to be gone. So the quick version of the situation is like this. Very little poop for a week means big trouble in the end (no pun intended). To get rid of this problem, you must do the following:You warm up 1 cup of prune juice and add 2 tablespoons of Milk of Magnesia. Drink it. YUM!Take 2 stool softeners as needed (and recommended by doctor or package).You also take 2 tablets of Gas X (again following instructions) and wait for the action to begin. In addition to you finally being able to poop, you'll probably experience intestinal cramps so intense they make you want to pass out, but at least you're finally going. The cramping is caused by everything you've taken to get going... and lasts for a good 24 hours. Nice.

Now that I'm going again (not entirely normally yet), I intend to stay that way. It's been very uncomfortable for the past 9 days and I don't ever want to go through this again.

The END.

4 comments:

Anonymous said...

Wow, you sure live a CRAPPY life!! HAHAHAHAHAHA I mean, I was just "pooped" after reading all about your adventure!! HEEHEEHEE
I hope you are not down in the "dumps" about it.... and I hope your next blog is not about hemorroids...... :)

Donsher said...

I had probs the other way. MY firend told me to try yogurt with probiotic (active yogurt cultures) I now eat it for breakfast a few times a week. Works GREAT! Good luck, 'may the farts be with you';}

Beckie said...

So sorry for your pain. Hopefully you will be able to "keep going." Hahaha!

Jamie said...

I had a somewhat similar experience when we were in the Philippines. Let's just say that Filipino food and I don't get along. I had to push my own elephant up the stairs, if you know what I mean.