Dare I Dream? ...

We've all asked this question. At this point in time I'm really mulling things around my mind. We all have those things which we most desire to have in our lives. Goals which we hope to accomplish. Dark things which we fear the most. All can relate to what I'm saying. And so here I am ... approaching 50 ... the "half way" point. How did I arrive here so quickly? And how have I failed to accomplish some of the things which I want most to have?

What is it that I most desire? What is it that seems to continue to elude me? What is it I fear I will never have the most?
                   This.....
 
I want to find a companion to grow old beside. I have accomplished some amazing things in my life. I have overcome incredible challenges. I have grown and evolved into a dynamic woman that is capable of great things. That being said, I have yet to find a trustworthy, loyal, and loving man to share my life with. Why?

Am I too picky? Am I unattractive? Do I expect too much? Do I have too much "baggage?" Am I too set in my ways? Am I too easy? Am I not easy enough? I could go on.... You get the point though. Is there a concrete reason why I have yet to find "him?" Probably not. But that doesn't make the reality of the situation any easier to handle.

Here's what I do know. I'm tired beyond belief of being on my own. I am lonely. Period. I hate going to bed alone. I long to have someone hold my hand... put his arms around me... talk to me in the dark... share my day with... AND grow with. I miss having someone to share my accomplishments with. I miss SO much. I'm also tired of hearing people tell me what a wonderful woman I am.... that I have so many talents... so many great things to offer someone. If I'm all that, why am I still alone?
For now I am unable to give up on my dream. I cannot stop hoping that I will have a man come into my life who will recognize the special person I am. I will not give up on finding someone who I will be able to give all that I am, have, and will become to. I still believe he's out there. Who knows, maybe I've already met him but haven't figured it out yet. I sure hope so. I don't want to continue this journey on my own.